Why isn’t there a Wario platform game on Nintendo Switch?


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Do you remember the old Wario platform games? It’s understandable if you don’t; the last one dates back to the Wii, in 2008. It’s not like Wario has been completely forgotten. He always shows up when Mario’s team is playing sports and he has a place in Smash. WarioWare games are very good, and a new one recently debuted on the Switch. But Nintendo, the absolute cowards, refuse to develop another platform game.

Make no mistake, it’s cool to see Wario take on Bayonetta or play a game of golf in a leisurely way. Of course there is Do together, and I install Wario in Mario Party games. But its platform games are full of possibilities, and I don’t think we’ve explored all the amazing places they could take us.

For example, take the plot of the first platform game Wario, in 1994 Wario Land: Super Mario Land 3. The game begins with Mario kicking Wario out of his castle, so Wario is like, You know what? It’s time to have mine, bigger Chateau. So he heads to an island, fights pirates and steals their treasure. If you 100% play and collect all, the game ends with Wario getting his own planet with his face engraved in it. It’s the first game, and Wario was already swinging for the fences with a planet of its own. Mario couldn’t even get to space for at least a dozen games. his frankness, and I still don’t see any celestial body with its face carved into their surface. All he has is a spaceship that is shaped like his head, which is not so cool.

A scene from the 2008s Wario Land: Shake it!.
Image: Good-Feel / Nintendo

That’s the key to Wario’s interest: he’s a better protagonist than Mario. It’s like how interesting Luigi is when you explore his cowardice in Luigi’s Mansion games. The contrast with the brave Mario is much more intriguing that Luigi just follows the route. Wario is interesting when you explore his greed and greed – they’ll take him anywhere. He will draw Mike teavee absurd and enter a television to find gold. He will fight pirates just because he heard they have a giant golden statue of Peach, and he thinks he can use it to extort money from Mario.

Platform games are best through this lens because it is inherently unpredictable. The endless dance of Bowser kidnapping Peach, or Mario taking down some sort of evil monarch is fine, but it’s already been done. I’m at the point where I start to doze off when I see Bowser appear in the first five minutes of a game, because I know exactly what’s going to happen. When Wario sets out on a wild quest, anything It could happen.

So do it, Nintendo, absolute cowards. You could do another game where Mario jumps from platform to platform to save Peach and maybe find Yoshi, but it’s been done a million times before. Instead, let’s join Wario on his quest to get rich and cause trouble. WarioWare is great and good, but platforms are all about exploring environments and occasionally stopping to smell the roses. Let’s take some time to really take a trip with Wario and understand what makes him tick. I don’t see any way it could go wrong.

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About Jason Zeitler

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